The sex toys. The trashy underwear. The excessive drinking. The shrieks of delight. Much as this might remind you of your days tricking around town, we are actually talking about a wedding shower: that bridal bastion where talk of gettin’ some gives way to getting’ stuff.

Though we’ve been spared the big white dress, foregone the awkward garter grope and avoided other blushing bride traditions, Men’s Vows is here to stake a guy’s claim on the groom’s shower. Why should the gals get to have all the parties and all the goodies?

The groom’s shower is a means for involving more people in the lead-up to your wedding in ways they might be more excited to participate in. Let’s face it, not every one of your gal pals and guy’s guys is going to be on-board with hosting or going to a debauched bachelor party of show tune singing or go-go dancing. Think of the groom’s shower as the PG-13 version of a more adult-rated bachelor party!

Here are a few ideas for a shower:

Gals' Afternoon In: Have your gal pals host the other women in your life. They’ve got plenty of experience to take on the challenge of creating a groom-centric event! Use this time to celebrate the women who have stood by your side.

Gentlemen Callers: Have your best guys, and as many of your best gays, host a dinner at which there is a roast. And, by this we mean, have your guy friends share the good, the bad and the hilarious about you. This is an opportunity for the guys to show the love.

Mixed Bag: Have your “gang” of friends plan an activity for men and women, be it a round robin tennis match, a vigorous hike coupled with a mountaintop picnic, or a late-night screening of your favorite movies or memories. Let your chosen brothers and sisters sing your praises.

As for the loot, some things to consider.

Your registry should cover you for all the things you and your future husband need or want. If your groom’s shower guests want to present you with yet more loot, then make it about you and your interests. For example, if you’re have a hobby, have people gift you things to do with the hobby as a means for ensuring that, in marriage, you consider to thrive as a photographer or painter or puzzle maker.

But, ultimately, we think the groom’s shower is a great opportunity for you to raise awareness and support for a charity that is important to you. Have your community of gals, guys or gangs join you in supporting a community in need.

As you're showered in love, make sure you spread the support!