In other years Memorial Day would approach and the sense of excitement that gay summer was beginning was huge.  The season would typically include visits to places like Fire Island and Ptown where tea dances and packed drag shows were part of the itinerary.  Summer Fridays meant rosé began at lunchtime with co-workers and continued through Sunday brunch with friends.   And in the hot, sticky, tank-top wearing season there was a month that was extra special for those of us who identify as gay.

Last year it was World Pride, hosting the biggest celebrations our community had ever seen.  While company’s showing their support in their branding was also met with criticism, I personally still got chills as I walked past shops, restaurants and gyms all endorsing equality.  

And now, one year later, our world looks completely different.  In many cities the aforementioned places are still shut down lacking even an option to hang a sign of support in their window.  Large group gatherings like pool or circuit parties are considered “super-spreaders” of the Coronavirus.  And if going through a pandemic wasn’t challenging enough, the pointless murders that have occurred in the United States have caused a painful but necessary global reaction.  I think many people are wondering if they can still feel Proud.

The truth is that the hardest moments in life are opportunities.  We as individuals and a community have the chance to turn June of 2020 into a time when we will always look back with Pride.  Let me spell that out for you in five steps.

Pandemic:. We are in one globally, and until health experts tell us otherwise, we should act like it.  Our community lost many lives to a health crisis before.  The best thing we can do right now is prevent Covid-19 from spreading.  Think how much better it will feel if we can gather in big groups next year because we were disciplined this year?  You still can and should celebrate, just be smart about it.  Practice social distancing, wear masks and wash your hands with pride. 

Reflection:  While many of us would have never asked for our lives to be so completely uprooted, it has also ushered in many self-discoveries. Are you able to identify what’s been positive about this experience?  Are there practices you’ve developed that you intend to keep? Has it simply been refreshing to slow down and have less places to be?  Many experts have stated we will never go back to living exactly as we once did.  It’s easy to focus on what’s been so awful about this year.  That doesn’t go away, but we also must recognize and appreciate the good.

Inclusion: Think about how many allies choose to march with us for our parades.  Now is a time for us to think about who we can be an ally to within the spectrum of LGBTQ+ and beyond.  Our community is one that often states we celebrate diversity.  Don’t just post that without putting it into action. This time is also incredibly isolating for many.  Reach out to people you’ve lost touch with or ones you’ve yet to meet.  

Drive.  This experience has been frustrating for everyone.  It has affected every industry and every city.  It has also made clear the need for change.  From politics to police-reform or healthcare to human rights, there are multiple movements happening right now.   Find one that drives you and get actively involved.  I guarantee you will feel proud if you contribute in some way to making this world a better place.

Expectations: Be realistic on what you’re going feel this month.  A zoom dance party is not going to be the same experience of getting to hear Madonna live at a Pier Dance.  Ask yourself what it is that really makes you feel proud and figure out a way to honor it.