Jake & Aaron: Love is Calm
Photos by: Ashley Hamm Photography; Aaron, Ruth and Jake
Life’s chaos—friends, family, work, and well… life—is made manageable, possible, even joyous when we know where to find safe harbor. That space where we feel centered.
For Jake and Aaron, that space became each other. The two met in October in 2017, weeks after first connecting on a dating app. Aaron asked Jake out. “We met at a vegan café near Rogers Park (in Chicago). Though neither of us was vegan, and despite the café being closed, we had a really nice dinner,” Jake explained. “Afterwards we went to a local bar to listen to a jazz quartet.”
Not long after their first few dates, the two felt “a quick sense of calm being together.” And as their dating continued, Jake said they both became aware of how “the other person made the stress of where we were at in life, just fade away.” There wasn’t a big moment during which they decided each was the one for the other, but the Christmas after first meeting Aaron spent the holiday with Jake’s “big, chaotic, but loving family.” For Jake to see Aaron fall for his family, and Jake’s family for Aaron made them both appreciate that they were falling for each other. A year later they moved in together.
Over the years their love developed on trips, over meals, looking after their adopted dog, Ruth. But it did most during the quiet nights together during COVID, where the two took pleasure in the silly things they did to entertain themselves.
Knowing Jake wouldn’t want their engagement to be a big scene, and thanks to COVID, Aaron proposed at home on a Saturday afternoon in 2021. He lit every candle in the house waiting for Jake to emerge from a series of graduate school meetings. Aaron had not counted on said meetings lasting until 8p. When Jake emerged, he found “every candle in the apartment burned down to the bottom of the wick!” But Aaron took to the piano, sang Jake a song, and asked him to marry him. Jake being a planner, also had a ring for Aaron and was quick to ‘counter-propose’.
“We knew what we wanted the day to feel like, rather than what we wanted it to look like,” Jake said about their wedding. And so, he insisted that the two plan the wedding themselves. Making sure every decision they made would help with that feeling they were after was their planning north star, with the vendors they worked with serving as compass. Jake went on to say: “you simply can’t appreciate how many people you rely on for your wedding.”
On October 29th, last year, the weather was surprisingly warm for Chicago, and ideal for Jake and Aaron’s ceremony held under a canopy of fall foliage. “To see everyone we love smiling at us as we walked down the aisle,” made for their favorite moment of the day.
Their friend KC officiated as friends and family looked on. Jake’s vows spoke to how Aaron had become both shelter and home to Jake. Aaron, through tears, promised to walk through life with Jake because, “together we can do so much more.” Of the moment Jake shared, “it was certainly emotional standing in front of our people, but we knew they were there to celebrate us. We really felt the love radiating from everyone around us.” He did go on to say: “Or maybe it was just the pre-ceremony cocktails!”
The reception moved inside of an old firehouse which made possible one of the best entrances ever: sliding down a fireman’s pole! Aaron and Jake instantly took to the dancefloor for their first dance as husband and husband. And not long after everyone was dancing inside and out the firehuse. Jake went on to say “we've heard some relatively ‘judge-y’ family friends say that it was the best wedding they've ever attended.”
It is impossible to convey the fact of how fast wedding days go by. But when surrounded by the love of friends and family and soon-to-be-husbands-turned-husbands, time does vanish. Perhaps too because time matters so much less when one has found the purest feeling of calm and peace in the way Aaron and Jake have in each other.
Credits:
Ceremony & Reception Venue: Firehouse Chicago
Photographer: Ashley Hamm Photography, @ashleyhammphotograpy
Videographer: Toast Wedding Films
Caterer: Big Star Chicago
Cake: Sweet Mandy B's
Apparel/Accessories: Blvdier
Floral Designer: Saville Flowers
